Thursday, September 30, 2010

War Poem

[[This is another poem I wrote in High School (circa March 2009) in the same class as "Yellow." The assignment for this one was to have a war poem. That was all the description said, so I wrote this. I'm not sure if it really reflects how I feel, but my teacher said it was the most powerful of our poem project and she didn't have any editing tips!]]


War Poem
Gripe and complain, gripe and complain;
You're all hypocrites.
You cry for peace and even make signs,
Draping yourselves with symbols of love
Claiming to live what you preach.
You're all hypocrites.
.
You gripe and complain at the news on
Your way to buy toy soldiers. Your children
Watch you to learn, but how can they while
You also promote them to play with
Tanks and battleships?
.
You love your children, as well you should, yet
You praise their sketches and pictures of war.
You tell them to play and hand them a gun. What's
That? It only shoots water, you say? Then
You turn to your spouse and gripe and complain
About a far away desert. You say they want to
Come home and they hate the heat, but
Your son plays the same game in
Your own backyard.
.
Instead of your tangible figures, you now buy
An animated army--slaves to your controller.
The scene becomes more graphic, but
You only think to get a higher score. You never question
The principle of the game, however
You gripe and complain when actual
Decisions of war are made.
.
Gripe and complain, gripe and complain;
You're all hypocrites.
You cry for peace and even make signs,
Draping yourselves with symbols of love
Claiming to live what you preach.
If you're going to gripe, then don't play the game;
If you play the game, then don't complain.

Yellow

[[This is a poem that I wrote back in High School. The assignment was to write a free verse and non-rhyming poem that reflected a mask of "the real me." My teacher's advice was to put more literary devices in it, but I haven't yet; a friend of mine was pestering me about not posting something new, so I had to put something up soon. Sorry that school is a little bit busy...]]


Yellow

Yellow. What a happy color.
Just the sound of it is the Wal-Mart Smiley Face.
It makes you smile when you see it,
Or maybe it's the low prices...or the service?
In any case it is the color that I try to symbolize my life after.


Yellow is energy throughout the day.
Yellow is rich and plentiful.
Yellow was used by the Chickasaw Tribe--my Tribe.
It is their symbol of piece and hope, along with white.
Yellow is kindness to a stranger.
Yellow is trying to make everyone feel welcome.


But, oh man sometimes I just want to ask,
"Why can't you just jump into the activities
Without making me feel obligated to
Give you special attention?
I've introduced you to loads of people!
Get comfortable already!"


That's when I go from Yellow
To Orange
To Red
To sometimes even Black.
But this is rare and often not manifested.


Green is the color of my eyes and life.
Could there be a better combination?
I think not.
But this is my pride talking,
Which mainly comes out in Red moments.


Large green eyes full of life and exploration.
Eyes large enough to see opportunities in all situations,
And open enough to try new things, and all things.


Not so complimentary to my life-filled eyes
Are the bags of exhaustion
Underneath, due to my willingness and interest
In doing everything I can.
"You're starting a new club?
I'll join!"
"You need help painting your house?
I'll be there!"
"In need of someone willing to do odd jobs, you say?
You got her!"


Dark circles sometimes overtake the life in me,
Trying to bring me down,
Trying to make me quit.


But Life will prevail!
As long as there is a Yellow smiling face,
Giving support and confidence,
Green will continue to grow.
I will continue to live and be Yellow.

Friday, August 27, 2010

On Thin Ice

[[This is the Descriptive Narrative Essay that I had to write for class as well. I chose to write about... well, you'll see. I've changed names to protect the not-so-innocent.]]





On Thin Ice



The doorbell rings, and I amble towards the knocking that soon follows. I was regretting this night all week, but the guy deserves a chance, right? After all, we kind of knew each other from Math Club in high school, and going out for a night a couple weeks before we each leave for school can't be that bad.


As I pass my mom in the front room adjacent to the entryway she reminds me in hushed tones, "Your dad's out camping this weekend so you can tell Colton I need you to be home earlier tonight, if you want." Wonderful, all-knowing, rule-making Mother; I'm not ashamed at all that I still use her to get me out of some unwanted situations.


"Thanks," I whisper back as my right hand tentatively turns the knob and keeps turning even after the latch is completely free. There's Colton, staring at me with his thinning prickly eyebrows, eyes that look like they belong to a rabid squirrel, large lips that can't hold another ounce of spit before qualifying as drool, and dark blonde dandelion hair--sticking out in every direction, ready to be blown off his head with the first sign of wind. I give him a quick hug, trying to decide if this is better than having to look at him. Definitely not: the hairs on my back slowly rise as I feel him breathing down my neck.


"Where do you want to eat dinner?" Colton asks as we climb into his blue Mustang.


"Anywhere is fine with me. Is there something that you haven't had in a while that sounds good to you?" I ask, trying to be a good date.


"No. You decide."


So, he's going to be one of those guys. Well then, I will be that girl. "We'll eat at Rome's Pizza," I say with authority. He starts the engine, and we're off. At least I think we are. It seems as if twenty minutes pass by the time we exit my neighborhood that's not even a quarter of a mile in diameter. Alright, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt; it was probably ten minutes. Regardless, a slow driver is a slow driver and I can't stand that in any situation--especially if the vehicle is a Mustang!


By the time we finally get onto some real roads, the conversation is completely dead. It takes all of five minutes to ask the usual "where are you planning on going to school in the fall," "what are you studying," "when are you leaving," etc. Maybe I'm a little bitter in deciding that since I had to choose where dinner would be, he would have to make conversation. Maybe he is thinking that since he is driving I should direct the flow of dialogue; whatever the case, nothing more is said until we are walking into the pizza place.


"Do you want to get personal pizzas or split one big one?" Colton asks while we stare at the menu on the back wall.


"Separate." There is no hesitation in my answer.


We sit down, waiting impatiently for our food to be brought out. Colton starts giving me a brief history of Rome's Pizza, the restaurant, and then branches off to how many there are in the city, who owns them, and what the family is like. Even when I interrupt him to tell him that my best friend's family is neighbors with the owners, he continues on, ignoring my comment, telling me everything about them. Trust me, I know, I think to myself. I wanted to date their son whose little brother is buddies with my best friend's younger brother. I've paid attention to this place and the owners. Our food is served, and I wonder if I should be polite and use a fork and knife to eat my pizza as I stare at the steaming pepperonis. I look up and see Colton, who almost causes me to get sick enough to have a few mystery toppings on my pizza. One by one he picks up pieces and strips of chicken, bacon, brisket, other meat-lover's chunks, and drops then into his Grand Canyon-sized mouth like the claws from and arcade room that drops stuffed animals in the winner's grab-hole. Before I can look away, the blood-red tomato sauce dribbles down his fingers and out the sides of his mouth as he plunges into his pizza to terrorize another innocent piece of meat. Never mind. Obviously he doesn't care if I eat this with my toes.


We finish our food and both stare the clock down with dagger eyes as if threatening it to move faster. Realizing there is a good half hour before the ice-skating rink five miles down the road opens, I start looking at the walls for anything that I can bring up to break the silence. Out of complete boredom I even start asking the same questions we already went over in the car, but try out how many different ways I can reword them.


"Ready?" Colton asks as I'm already half way out of my seat.


"Sure!" Finally--a change of scenery and possibly more conversation opportunities.


We arrive at the Ice Center and Colton brings out his personal skates. Apparently he was an amazing hockey player back in the day. I lace my rentals up, and we slide onto the slick ice.


"My favorite thing to do while ice skating is to play tag," Colton informs me. Perfect. I can play tag on ice and I won't have to talk to him.


"You're it!" I yell as I smack his left shoulder and skate off, expecting a hit in return. But it never comes. As I search the ice, I find Colton on the complete opposite side of the rink in his own world. Even when skating next to him, he doesn't seem to notice me. There is no way I am going to skate unnoticed by his side, so I slow my pace and let him glide on in front of me.


After skating alone for thirty or so minutes, Colton, my date, finally arrives at my side. "Hey, there are some kids over there that are playing tag, is it cool if I play too?"


What am I, your mother? "Yeah--"


"Thanks! Bye!" And there he goes before I can add, "I'll come too." And I'm back to circling the rink, completely surrounded by 10-15 year olds.


After two hours pass, I can't handle it any longer. My feet and ankles ache from the plastic skates, I'm bored to tears, and my date continues to ditch me for ten-year-olds. I leave to go to the bathroom--anything to get off the ice for a bit--and come across the doors leading to freedom. I can't, I think, that's so not classy. Not like he has room to talk, I argue with myself. I do have a friend that lives in the apartment complex across the street... I stand there for a good ten minutes as wafts of fresh air tickle my nose hairs with the opening and closing doors, until I hear a voice that scratches my ear drums.


"There you are. I was wondering where you went." It's Colton, of course.


"Yup, just had to go to the bathroom. Want to leave and get Sonic drinks or something?" I will give anything to leave at this point; if he wants my first child, it's his.


"Well, the rink closes in like an hour and a half. We can go after." And so we are back on the ice. He joins the game again with his new friends. This time I try to be involved by tagging one of the kids, but just like the first time I tried to kick off a game, I end up alone; skating, skating, skating, and going around and around and around the rink with nothing changing.


At 9:55 p.m. Colton finally appears at my side. "I have to be home by 10:00 because my dad is out camping and my mom doesn't want to wait up late for me. Sorry I didn't tell you earlier."


"That's OK," Colton says. "The rink closes in five minutes anyway. We'll skate for a few more minutes and then leave."


The last minute swoops around the oval rink, and Colton and I end up racing towards the exit, the finish line for the night's long and dragging battle. As I near the opening, I am too late in realizing that I can't stop as quickly as I can get up and go. Crash! Right into the wall, leaving a gash and throbbing stiffness in my right pinky finger. This is just peachy. I walk up to the worker that takes the skates and ask for a band-aid, but to my dismay, they don't have one. I'm wearing white and there is no way I am going to smudge blood on my sleeves.


"A band-aid?" What do you need that for?" Colton asks. I show him my poor pinky and tell him what happened. "Well, that's because on ice there is less friction than on other surfaces, so sometimes it can be harder to stop." All I can do is gawk in unbelief at this comment. Thank you for that eye-opening science lesson. Who would have known that I had missed out on all the science class opportunities, not only offered, but required, in thirteen years of grade-school?


Finally we get back in the car, my pinky still refusing my attempts to move it. I blankly stare at my hands resting in my lap, not even caring if I'm being polite anymore, until we come to a stop and park with fluorescent lights and terrible 60's music surrounding us--Sonic.


"Colton, I have to be home--like ten minutes ago," I remind him, completely annoyed.


"This won't take very long. What do you want to drink?" I give him my order and snap my fingers at him when he tries to turn the car off, hinting to stay longer. As soon as we get our drinks, I point to my neighborhood, just across the street. The tension only gets worse with every rotation of the tires. We are driving literally 5 miles per hour down my street, and I consider for a moment just opening the door and jumping out. His foot probably isn't even on the gas; the engine is most likely just pulling us forward. It's obvious that Colton has something to say but is reluctant to spit it out. We pull into the driveway and I immediately reach for the door handle that will release me from this prison.


"Wait, I want to tell you something. I want you to know that I had a really great time tonight. I've only ever had a crush on three girls in my life and you are one of them. I've liked you for a long time and have wanted to go out with you for a while now." He completely pours his heart out to me; he's a giant pitcher of pink lemonade, and I am a sippy-cup with the lid still on. It is a complete mess. First of all, why don't you tell all your new skating friends that you had a great night? How can you even say you thought tonight was great? Second, how can you have the nerve to say that to me? When have I given the slightest hint that I like you back? That's it! No more pity dates.


Completely dumb-founded, I have only one choice. "Thanks, I'm flattered," I respond, and leave without another word.

Monday, August 16, 2010

J-Pizzle: the Rap Queen

[[I wrote this essay for an assignment in my Writing and Reasoning English class (the required English class at school). The purpose of this essay is to spotlight someone that is different from you in a certain area of life, and to not give a biography to describe how they're different. Enjoy!]]


J-Pizzle: the Rap Queen
With so many genres of music today it is more common to pick and choose the music you like and the music that you despise. My sister Jamie and I are polar opposites in this area; I enjoy anything besides rap music, and that's all she fills her ears with, overflowing its influence into her daily life. Throughout the entirety of the week my sister has made Lil Wayne's songs outline her life style in many ways.
"Hip-Hop attic, hip-hop at it..."
On Mondays my sister has no problem switching out of Sunday worship mode and hip-hopping into Lil Wayne music (her favorite rapper). As soon as she gets up in the morning and starts getting ready for the day the radio is tuned in to 98.5 The Beat and the steady booming bass bellows in the entire house. Because I am a morning person and am always awake before her, I trick myself into thinking that I will get to pick the music that we listen to while getting ready for the day; I am always wrong in thinking this. She is older and always has the last say in what goes on, as far as the two of us are concerned. As she storms down the hall I say my quick good-bye's to good ol' Slow Hand and various Classic Rock artists and mentally prepare myself for the complete turnaround. She dials the knob into the perfect position and my ears start bleeding almost immediately. She knows every word to every verse and even knows every part the backup singers chime in with.
"While I'm countin' my paper...I'm handlin' my biz..."
Tuesday nights, among others, Jamie makes her green paper working the night shift at Lifetime Fitness. From 10:00 p.m. to 7:00 a.m. she's at the front desk, cleaning around the locker rooms, or helping members of the gym work the machines. Since there aren't too many people that come to work out during these hours my sister has plenty of free time. This past winter holiday she filled that time by writing her own rap song about Christmas and the family coming to visit. In my spare time I enjoy reading, so one day I offered to read her rap. What she wrote was very sincere and meaningful, but took about a week of Les Miserables to heal my eyes from the destroyed grammar that was used.
"Boy did I mention I fly like a pigeon..."
On a typical Wednesday night after Institute, my sister flies to the top of the list to sing karaoke. The one time I gave in and joined the group, Adam and Adam, two of her close guy friends, were first to rap a duet. Adam #1 didn't even have to glance at the screen for help with the lyrics, he just steadily chanted the words to the song saying, "Now I ain't sayin' she a gold digger..." while Adam #2 spiced it up singing, "She steel me money...when I'm in need..." in the background. The whole time they were up there Jamie was hooting and hollering things like "yeeeaaahhh," "shoot," "that's sick," etc. when it was Jamie's turn she added a little Salt and Peppa to the mix rapping their popular song "Shoop." Finally they all convinced me to get up and I chose to sing "Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen. Everyone loved it, but it was completely out of line with what else was picked.
"Sittin' in a Caddy, bright like Batty..."
Thursdays are the days when most of my sister's other friends have work off and are rolling down the road in their lifted cars with 22"s and bright spinning rims on the way to their play days. Their favorite thing to do is float down the river in tubes for hours on end sun-bathing and having a good time. The best part is when they bring their cooler with the built in speakers so they have sodas and their rap music all in one. The river is fun every once in a while, or even once a month, but it's generally the same river they go to every week with no changes. Mostly when they go, they float down at least twice and spend all day in the company of drunken college students and sometimes make new friends with these people. "Guess what! I met a boy the other day," Jamie called to tell me. "Nice! What's his name? How did y'all meet?" I asked the routine questions. "Well, we met at the river...but he's a good guy, I promise," she tried to reassure me. "Plus, Lil Wayne is his favorite singer too, so we hit things off right away." Most river days don't end with phone calls like this, however. They usually end with burnt shoulders and newly thought up rap songs of the events that happened while outside enjoying the day.
"Started out hustlin', ended up ballin'..."
On Friday and Saturday nights there is always a rap battle or two taking place around town. Adam (#1 mentioned earlier) and my sister enjoy going and hearing the rhymes that others people sharing their passion can come up with on the spot. One night after she came home, I finally asked what it was that she enjoyed about these rap battles, what was it that made her want to go. "Well, aside from me liking rap music, it's really impressive to see someone under pressure and without any preparation get up and start rapping and still make sense. Even when I sit and think about it for a while and write it down, it's hard to make a rap song with good rhythm and thymes that I'm happy with."
When she told this to me it was easier to see that even though I sometimes view rap and all the things associated with it as a joke, it is a real work of art that she is passionate about. This made me appreciate that, even though our likes and preferences are very different, we share the same intensity with the things we are most ardent for. I realized that just because she has a few different opinions on things than me, it doesn't mean we can't value each other's company and friendship.
After that epiphany I wasn't too judgmental when she brought home a boy from one of these rap battles, but I couldn't help chuckling when she introduced him saying, "This is Ricardo, but his rap name is R-Kive. You can just call him Kive for short if you want."

Hello, hello!

Julianne (Jules) Paul reporting from the most-adventurous college life! I've decided that I'm most likely going to stay in school at BYU-Idaho, or Ydaho if you will, instead of transfering to BYU in Provo, Utah. Since Ydaho doesn't offer Linguistics as a major, I've chosen to major in English with an emphasis in Professional Writing. With the expectation that I will be writing quite a bit for this major, I've decided to start a blog in order to practice writing--the more I do it, the easier it is! Also, I have many fun and entertaining stories that I would like to write down somewhere for my own keeps-sake, and so I can share them with other people; this hits both birds with one stone.

Let me know what you think--not only about the stories, but about my writing style, any grammatical errors, etc. This is a blog to give me practice and helpful criticism, so don't be shy!